A Little Jolt

I had a little jolt
That I
I could not

That I couldn't tag along
With you--had to go on my own
And--


Ariadne

Well what do you think my darling
You are just like me
What do you think my darling
Well what do you think my darling
You are just like me
What do you think my darling

You get so sad my darling
And I can't pull you from the deep
You get so sad my darling
And nothing I can tell you
Will reach you when you're lonely
But follow where my thread leads
While I sing

I understand your trepidation
I understand your trepidation
I understand your trepidation
I understand

 


Beneath the Spring

We've had some fun
We've had some good loving
On to the next thing
My conscience forcibly brings
So many things that I could do
One of them being you
The slow slide into lying
And here come endless apologizing

Don't make a mess of things
My mother warns to me
Don't make a mess of things
I warn to me
I find myself keeping house
Find myself taking the trash out
I find myself resenting you
I give it up myself, it's true

Can a woman love
Can a woman love
Can a woman love
And not lose herself

I hide myself deep in the traffic
I hide myself behind a line of trees
I hide myself deep in the current
I hide myself beneath the spring


Have I caught your eye
You and your wicked half smile
In a land that's all yours
I look on with eyes closed
In my dresses
In my makeup
I'm your woman now

In the city street
Buying incense, tea
In the dark
Your lips, your gifts, your blood

Buying Incense and Tea


California

Out in these hills, under the old oak tree
I can't recall just what was worrying me
the ocean's just below, glittering

I feel more like myself as my skin turns brown
I feel more like myself as my hair turns gold
I sit in silence
it is my bread and butter

One looks for praise in the proportion that one is unsure
She who is sure does not seek approval, she knows

I move into my art and don't know how I came
I move into my art and it's best if I don't know just how I got there
it has started
I am nameless
I am golden


We plant the corn
As though
As though
What came before
Was merely a dream
A...

The Corn


As I walk
As it's darkening I must go alone
As I walk
As I'm darkening I must go alone

Darkening

 

 


Duck and I'll follow
I long to be eternally yours
Just like my mother
Just like my father
It's what feels good to me

Call but I don't answer
I long to be eternally free
Not like my mother
Not like my father
But what feels good to me

Oh my dear sister
Oh will you run away with me
Oh I'm so hungry

Eternally

 

 

 


Oh your love feels like finery
The way your words shatter over me
And in your arms I'm the deepest sea
And you're the sun laughing over me

What does home, what does marriage mean
And must I follow its speeding train
At our best we embody
Everything that I wanna feel
Feel...

Just how good must a good day be
To outweigh the malfunctioning
At our worst I'm the darkest sea
And you're the sun that is sinking
See?

How am I
How am I doing?

Not so good, not so good
See notes on back, needs improvement

Finery


I believe I will find happiness
each day I get closer
you are my all
we rise and we fall
but you know that well, baby

I'm so afraid they
are closing the gates
maybe I should have gone sooner
but I'm loosening my grip on this thing
my spot in the ring, God help me

What do I need to finally feel free?

Happiness


My love, deeply buried, emerged at night
my love, a tightening secret that floods my mind
with my love walking hallways in such disrepair
but ooh to catch a glimpse of his lonesome stare

Now I see that you are, like me, on the verge of tears
on the verge of something so grand, but will it appear?
like me, your hair is blown back
like me, you're frozen still
your heart's full of longing and your head is full of fear

I wake up in the morning
to the sunlight in my eyes
coming at me like a warning
coming at me like a homing

Oh come my darling hold me
for I have loved you for so long
with you alone I can speak freely
and the meaning comes through clearly

Oh I love this boy forever
he is my sweetest friend
we got an old fashioned passion
we caught the last of it

Homing


Oh my darlin' when you told me
That you would be my man
And you said in the next breath
But I don't think I can
Oh my darlin' in the moment
I didn't feel a thing
But in the morning, in the morning
Oh the pain came flooding

And the pain just stops my breathing
And I can't get no air
I am shot down, I am stupid
And I don't have a care
Well if it weren't for my dear mother
I would end it all right here
But then I know she would be crying
And then there'd just be more tears

Darlin' I just can't let it go, I need
You to come break my heart a little more
All that I want is nothing more than for
You to crawl into my bed and

I Don't Think I Can


Let's climb up on the car
And watch the stars

Oh how I wish I could take your hand
But I don't think I can

Let's Climb Up on the Car


What do you think should we take it slow
Or go as fast as my body wants to go
What do you think shall I learn your name
Fore I give you all I long to give
And let you do the same

Well you can play a song and I will sing a harmony
You will cook me dinner and then clear away the plates for me
Wrapped up in your loving arms imperfect as I am
You don't tell me I'm beautiful, you tell me I'm a badass but
I hold back my love
I hold back my love

What do you think was it too much too soon
I felt your mind just leaving when I walked into the room
Now I've got one hand clamped over my mouth
And the other searching in the dark for the fastest way out
So I take a walk and I walk eight miles
And by the end of it I still can't seem to shake off your smile
Ah but my pride's got a hold on me
I just lie and wait and mouth the words what will be will be

Lie and Wait


Thank God for your father
he let his son show love
you're so kind and wild-eyed
you are so full of trust

And I don't think we will ever be
lovers again
but you're so loyal to me
my old friend

You are loyal as we take a midnight drive
and you are loyal as we walk the railroad tracks
you were loyal as you deeply sympathized
and you were loyal as you held me, held me high

You were always on my side

Your touch leads to a gentle kiss
and your kiss leads to my bed
you do not have to be afraid
my old friend

Cause I am loyal as we take a country drive
and I am loyal as I lay down on your lap
I am loyal as the air is filled with gold
and I am loyal as the red, red sun takes hold

I was always on your side

Loyal


From the top of my head
through the reaches of time
I am writing it down
I am speaking my mind
through the black of the night
through the yellow lamplight
the stars they still shine

I went to war for my dreams
and I fought for glory and other unreal things
I fought with all the panic of my feared inadequacies
with pasted over reasoning
and other people's mutterings
and it didn't lead to anything

Well I'm not sorry
I'm not sorry
but I miss those parties
I miss those parties

You know I love you so much
but when push comes to shove
am I just another peg to one-up
when I reach out my hand
what do you see my friend
what do you see my friend

Our love, our love
your words like knives
my love was slain
I can't go to you when you call my name
through the black of the night
through the yellow lamplight
the stars...

Miss Those Parties


I just want to be simple
I want to be good
I want to be simple
I want to be good
I want to be

We used to crash parties
And steal the hors d'oeuvres
And I...

A life that's so simple
Think I could attain

Night


I wanna go where nobody knows my name
where nobody's seen my worst mistakes
oh won't you hang me out to dry
oh to start over, no questions asked

your life is a steady pace of skill and grace
and I try not to envy you, but I do
cause I spend all of my time
just trying to get to the starting line

I'm on the bank, the bridge burned down long ago
but I'm still on my knees
singing darlin', darlin' please
can't we just hang this out to dry
can't we just start over, no questions asked

No Questions Asked


With these chords
I'm in the orchards
on the hill
in the salty water

With these chords
I have no notions about
what I will do
or who I could be

Orchards


You’re too much for me, I’ll go now
And if you want me I’ll be at the bar
Oh our love, is it gone

Well I’ll go now, you’ve stopped asking me to stay
You’ve wrestled me down and I’ve spit in your face
Oh our love is it gone

I know you’ve got a new girl
Guess I should care but I don’t
I just wish that I could sleep
I just wish that I could eat
We are not growing apart
I’ve just lost my broken heart
We used to fuck all the time
Now we just fight out of line

When I broke your heart
I slid down to the floor
When I broke your heart
You bolted the door
Oh our love, is it gone

You seem determined to squeeze
The last drop of love out of me
If you just beg me enough
I’ll learn to live with what I’ve got
Our house our neighborhood street
Our bed the food that we eat
Our instruments strewn around
Our little shit plot of ground
Now I won’t let you hold my hand
All practicality be damned
I want to sleep in hotels
I want to drive like hell

If I keep on working and I bow my head
Will you take me to where I most want to be led

Plot of Ground


I went for a walk
I know there's a lot of talk

Talk


Won't you go sit on the hill for me
and bring a bottle of wine
and watch the sun go down on the ocean
and tell me how do you feel
tell me how does it feel

Won't you go downtown for a city day
and walk around the crowds
and read all day in cafes
and tell me how do you feel
tell me how does it feel

And won't you go to the usual place
where everybody knows our names
and talk after the show
to friends you didn't know before
and tell me how you feel?
tell me how it feels

Tell Me How it Feels


Well I worked real hard and I took my time
I put all I could muster on the line
but it was not meant to be
it was not meant to be
now I weep eternally
but it was not meant to be

Now the boy I love's got a tradition
but me myself I just go fishing
and I don't know what I'm fishing for
but Ueland said that that's a fine thing

Well I sure would love some validation
but Remler said don't bother waiting
cause it never comes
it never comes
and when it does
it's not enough

Validation


I'm thankful I am
I’m thankful I am
but I walk the line
I walk the line

I've got one foot in
I've got one foot out
at all times
at all times

When I was entrenched
When I was entrenched
I did not know
nobody did
someday I might
someday I might
just subtly mention it

The light in their eyes
The light in their eyes
when I crossed the line
began to glaze
but I like to think I
I like to think I
am hurtling towards my alibi

 

V. Woolf


Darling babe
Baby darling
Look at the water
It is sparkling

Wine blue ocean
Wine blue ocean
Blue ocean

Wine Blue Ocean